well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
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