that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Randomize