I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Randomize