My friends, they love my intelligence
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize