Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
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