Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Welp...herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Randomize