omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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