just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
tell me about the eggs
Randomize