...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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