Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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