im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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