omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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