i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize