PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize