just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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