Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Sext me about skeletons
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize