Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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