Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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