So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize