I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
My vagina is very pro this idea
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
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