you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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