my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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