What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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