hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize