Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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