I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
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