Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
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