We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
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The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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