how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize