you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I currently don't understand fingers.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize