I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
My penis needs a shock collar
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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