Don't you send me to vm
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize