It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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