well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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