I think I won the penis lottery.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
worst night to have a conscience
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
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