The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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