Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Randomize