So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize