even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Randomize