God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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