Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize