I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize