It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize