I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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