Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize