these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
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she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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