Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Boobs speak an international language.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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