he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
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