we made out on top of his cat.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
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I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
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I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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