I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
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